Dildo: I lost my libido in my relationship, what should I do?

When you've been in a relationship for a few years, your sex life is often different from when you started. Circumstances change and so does this constant need to pounce on each other. But what if you completely lose your libido in your relationship? What are the causes? Can you regain your libido? And how?

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Can Men Use Dildos: Lack of sexual desire in a couple

If you've just given birth or have young children, are going through menopause, or are taking certain medications, your libido may temporarily decrease. There is a reason for this: the drugs affect your hormones and with young children you are extremely tired. But what if you lose your libido for no reason? According to research conducted in the United States, this phenomenon is common. It is estimated that 5-13% of women in the United States suffer from low libido. Other studies estimate that this figure is even higher: around 20% of women have a (very) low libido.

How Do I Use A Dildo: Low libido in young women

It is wrong to think that low libido only affects older women. I also notice it when I bring up the subject with my friends and those around me. https://www.viva-awa.com/dildos
“My sex life was put on hold for years. In reality, we were no longer intimate. Until I started a bdsm relationship with another man, my husband knew about it. Since then, my sex life with my husband has also revived. – Priscilla (28)
“I no longer have any sexual desire at all. If I never made love again, that would be fine with me. My doctor thought my low libido was due to medication, so I switched medications. But it only made my condition worse and my libido didn't return. Today, I resume my old treatment. I don't mind, but I feel guilty towards my husband. He knows I'd forgive him a misstep, because not making love at all is inconceivable to him. – Carolina (35)

The problem of low libido

A low libido doesn't have to be a problem. Everyone is different, and if you and your partner are both happy with your sex life, there's not necessarily a reason to want to change anything. The situation becomes more difficult if your partner's libido is higher than yours and this leads to problems in your relationship. 85% of women surveyed in the aforementioned US study said that their low libido affected their intimacy with their partner. Intimacy, the strong bond with your partner, is something that needs to be nurtured.

How Do You Use A Dildo: Tips to boost your libido

#1. Talk it over

Talk about your low libido with your partner. It's important for your couple that your partner knows why your sex life is almost non-existent. It's also important for your partner to know that it's not because you no longer find them attractive. You can also talk about it with a professional. Your general practitioner, for example, or a sex therapist. The general practitioner can determine with you the causes of your low libido. In addition to the previously mentioned reasons, stress, depression, low self-esteem or certain chronic diseases can also be the cause of low libido. A professional such as a sex therapist can help you increase your libido.

#2. Take the time to do foreplay

Foreplay is still too often underestimated. They are essential for a woman to prepare for penetration. Without good foreplay, it's hard to have a moist vagina. There are all kinds of foreplay: kissing, caressing and masturbating, but also watching a porn movie together or reading an erotic story . Good foreplay can last up to twenty minutes.

#3. Sex toys are effective

A sex toy can really help rekindle the fun in your relationship. It is a solution for women who have difficulty enjoying, for example. Having trouble reaching orgasm while masturbating? A pulsed air vibrator that stimulates your clitoris can be a great solution. The Wand vibrator is also effective: this vibrator is used to stimulate your clitoris with powerful vibrations. Of course, sex toys are also fun and exciting to use and can actually improve your libido.

#4. Use lube

If you take the time to do foreplay but can't get a wet vagina, there's lube . Use it, because it prevents vaginal pain. There are several types of lubricants. The most common are water-based and silicone-based lubricants. The latter leaves the vagina moist longer, but cannot be used with silicone sex toys. The water-based lubricant can be used with any sex toy and won't leave stains on your bedding.

#5. Turn your sex life upside down

“Before, I liked sex. When I had children, I no longer wanted them. I thought it would eventually come back, but it didn't. I had to do some work on myself. The first thing I did was teach my husband about orgasms and the female body. I never wanted to feel used again, when he ejaculated inside me, satisfied, without my reaching an orgasm. We also started to experiment more.
Here's how we ended our boring sex routine. In addition, we have enriched our sex life with several sex toys : mainly pulsed air vibrators that I use solo, but also with him. And from time to time, we send sexts about what we want to do and it's so exciting that I'm already wet when we meet. The first time, I came in no time. – Britt (38)