Descriptive Paragraph Exercise 1



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Descriptive Paragraph Exercise 1




     Mildred loves pizza.  It is one of her favorite foods.  She likes fresh pizza the best.  Her all time favorite pizza is the one she orders most often.  She likes the cheese that is on it.  Extra sauce is something that she orders as well.  My friend Mildred is into pizza.



DIRECTIONS:  The above paragraph is an example of a paragraph that needs some help to make it truly descriptive.  Rewrite (on your own paper) the above paragraph so that it becomes a true descriptive paragraph.



Here is an example of a pizza paragraph that is descriptive.  Notice how it appeals to the senses. 



            Warm, gooey pizza with a paper thin crispy crust that crunched when you bite it is one of favorite all time foods to chow down on.  (Smell) The enticing, spicy aroma of tomatoey sauce that has a splash of garlic added to it just makes the water in my mouth run like a flooded stream. (Touch) The warm, comforting feel of a just baked slice in my hand makes my mouth growl like a hungry bear. (Sight)   The mounds of melted cheese, piled just like freshly shoveled snow, bring a smile as wide as the Grand Canyon to my face. Freshly baked pizza makes me feel like a kid in a candy store.


Using words that appeal to the senses (sight, touch, taste, smell, hearing) make this paragraph better.  In its current form, the paragraph does not work as a descriptive paragraph.


            The night sky is interesting to me.  All of the stars are bright.  There are so many stars in the night sky. I often wonder if


there is anything out there in the universe. Watching a falling star gets my attention.  I could spend a lot of time just looking


up into the night sky.


            (I will start you out.)  The inky vastness of the night sky, with all of the millions of stars that resemble sparking diamonds punctuating it, is something I never get bored of seeing.  (Now you do the rest.)